NEWSITORIAL: Five Minutes To Doomsday

A great danger faces the world.

According to the news, criminal scientists are close to developing the so-called "Gay Bomb," a briefcase explosive that, if detonated in a major city such as San Francisco, could turn millions of upright citizens into perfumed, bone-licking, ass-pounding, boa-clad abominations.

Within minutes, every social interaction would be transformed in a diamond hard frenzy of Dad-on-Dad graftification, with all human dignity sacrificed on the Satanic altar of ecstasy.


In other words, never has Man faced a more terrifying threat.

We hereby call upon President George W. Bush to convene an International Council on Gay Weapons Disarmament to hammer out a lasting, unbreakable ban on this doomsday device.

Our children are at stake. Our families are at stake.
Stop the Gay Bomb... NOW!

Focus On The Family: Dick & Liz, 1968

What's happening to the American family?

Nothing, if we Draft Dick Cheney!

PS: He's religious, too!




MARY & HEATHER BABYBOOM COUNTDOWN:
STILL TWELVE DAYS!!!!!*

*Unofficial

"I believe Dick Cheney is the absolute outstanding candidate Mr. Bush could have selected."

-- Rev. Jerry Falwell
August 2, 2000

Forever In Our Hearts

I did not see you close your eyes,
Or hear your last faint sigh,
I only heard that you were gone,
Too late to say goodbye.

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POSTSCRIPT: We noticed FoxNews, on their Breaking News at the bottom of the screen, are saying Jerry Falwell has died. They have left off the word "Reverend". They are so quick to call Al Sharpton, Rev Sharpton, but refuse to put Reverend in front of Reverend Falwells' name. Disgraceful!

We tried to contact them but it directs us to sign up to Excite.com before we can email them. If anyone has acsess to Excite.com, would they please contact FoxNews and ask them to please show as much respect for Reverend Falwell as they do "Reverend" Sharpton. Thanks in advance!!